Parashat: Matot-Masei

Parashat: Matot-Masei
Torah Reading: Numbers 30:2–36:13

“If a householder makes a vow to Adonai or takes an oath imposing an obligation on himself, he shall not break his pledge; he must carry out all that has crossed his lips.”

— Numbers 30:3

Before I went to rabbinical school, my life was inundated with Jewish teachings and non-rabbinic (but still extraordinarily on point) values-based expectations. One such teaching came from my mother, The Honorable Laura G. Weiss, who repeatedly taught us to “never make promises that you can’t keep.” She refused to promise us that events would happen, that a meal would be made, that the weather would work out. For her, keeping your word was essential to maintaining both your reputation and relationships.

In Parashat Matot-Masei, we start strongly with the same advice: be careful with what you vow to do — you’re expected to carry out what you promise to do, even to the infintessimal degree. Perhaps this is why one of my favorite recommendations for a potential job candidate is simply “they do what they say they’re going to do.” Keeping to our word, ensuring that we’re never overpromising and underdelivering, strengthens our relationships and sets realistic expectations for what we can depend on.

And, if you do your best, and still can’t turn that vow into a verb? Don’t worry. That’s what Kol Nidrei is for.

— Rabbi Amanda K. Weiss