Parashat: Va’etchanan

Parashat: Va’etchanan
Torah Reading: Deuteronomy 3:23-7:11

“But God was wrathful with me on your account and would not listen to me. God said to me, ‘Enough! Never speak to Me of this matter again!’”

~Deuteronomy 3:26

While I have never been a parent, at this point in my career, I can smile, and exhaustedly claim, that I have had thousands of kids. During that time, I have witnessed them make mistakes, blame others, shy away from responsibility, accept responsibility, apologize, and make better choices. During that time, I have (more often than not) learned to transition from fixing their mistakes for them to removing the pressure of cleaning up messes that were not my own making.

And yet…here, in Moses’ exasperated retelling of the happenings that prevent him from entering the Promised Land, there’s a slight echo of his brother Aaron’s reimagined “not my calf, not my calamity” version of the story. Moses has forgotten about his own public outcry against his people, his own physical manifestation that has cancelled his crossing over the Jordan. Moses—in a moment of frustration once again reminds his rebels, his “wicked children,” that it is because of them that God was wrathful with him –and due to no fault of his own, Moses is picking up the punishment.

When we tell ourselves an alternative form of reality, one that shifts the weight of responsibility onto another, it might make us feel better in the moment—but it won’t help us grow into a person that can face the future as a stronger version of ourselves. While leadership is indeed vulnerable (we learned this from Parashat Chukat), it’s imperative that it’s also honest—with the people we lead yes, but particularly with ourselves. When we own up to our own misdeeds, we can overcome mountains and multitudes.

~Rabbi Amanda K. Weiss